


Hard To Control (Let Me Sleep)

by Looking-foursomthing (stupidityisthefirstruleforsuccess)



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, Judith does not exist, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rick and Lori have a bad relationship, Slow Burn, Teacher-Student Relationship, carl is 18
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-30
Updated: 2018-07-21
Packaged: 2018-10-12 23:11:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10501407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stupidityisthefirstruleforsuccess/pseuds/Looking-foursomthing
Summary: Carl goes off to college a few states away, Negan just happens to be an english professor at his college. The relationship develops kinda slow.





	1. Moving Is Always A Pain

Carl started looking into colleges and scholarships early. Because his father was a police officer he could find lower cost schooling at a few different colleges. The few he found he applied to; Carl only got accepted into four, and all of them were farther away than he would have wanted. 

Carl didn’t score high enough on the standard test to get a full ride but he did find one that would pay most of the cost. The college was two states over which make Carl somewhat nervous, parents too far away to really fall back on if he needed to. Moving that far away was nauseating, new people and places for him to get to know, places he didn’t really want to know. But when you can go to college for half the price it you take the chance.

So Carl waited for the day to come when he would have to leave the nest and suffer. Moving day was hell. Lori cried. Rick dropped too many boxes. Carl wanted to just tell them both to leave. He didn’t, but he thought about it. 

By the time Rick and Lori left Carl was more mentally exhausted than physically. Those two in the same room was about as hard to control as a mad bull. Carl sometimes wondered if they had just stayed together for his sake, if that was the case than they might divorce now. Maybe they’d leave each other and find someone else so they’d actually be happy.

Carl’s roommate’s name was Mikey. He flunked out the first year so he had to retake it. He seemed cool, kind of looked like a stoner though. Mikey’s friends, Ron and Enid, were both in their second year. Carl met them when they came over to see how Mikey had settled in.

Carl found out that Ron and Enid were dating, that was fine by him, he didn’t really care.

“We should definitely hang out sometime.” Ron said enthusiastically.

“Yeah, sure.” Carl said trying and failing to sound as enthusiastic.

Carl left the conversation gracefully to leave the room and find his way to where the tour guide was supposed to be. He showed up early so to waste time he watched all the people. Almost everyone had parents or close loved ones sending them off. There were some people that looked like they were coming back for a second time. 

Carl was by himself but he didn’t mind it, it was definitely easier to be alone than to deal with both his parents at the same time.

The tour guide came around and introduced herself as Sasha, one of the staff, then proceeded to whisk the group of new students around. She showed so much in so little time that Carl believes that he might never remember where anything is.

After the tour Carl was handed a map. He holds onto it like a lifeline.

The next day, first day of classes, Carl wakes up late and rushes out the door. He runs down the stairs and heads off to the right, toward his class. 

What Carl didn’t know was that there was another man walking the same way, much slower. Carl ran around the corner separating the two men and ended up on his ass. He had run right into the man’s back bouncing off and onto the ground. Carl dropped his things and the man did as well.

The man turned around to see who the hell ran into him, upon seeing Carl the snarl he was wearing dissipated and a cocky grin took its place. The man held out his hand for Carl to take, the latter took his hand all along his cheeks were on fire. 

Carl stood up, with the man’s help, and stooped over to collect his things an apology on his lips. The man beat him to the punch.

“Shit, kid. Guess you have somewhere to be.” The man stated, same cocky grin on his face. A face Carl had to say wasn’t that bad looking.

The man leaned down with definitely too much grace and collected his own things. When he was upright again he grabbed Carl’s shoulders twisting him around and brushing his back off. He then twisted Carl back around.

“You’re probably rushing to a class. I’m I right?” Carl just nodded dumbly, a blank expression on his face. “I guess you should go then.”

“Yeah...”

The man gently pushed Carl in the direction he was headed before the incident. Carl finally remembered what he was doing and started running again. He didn’t look back, never wanting to see the man again.

Carl showed up to his first class late but he didn’t really care.

+++

Carl walked into his Wednesday class surprised to see the man that he had run into was his teacher. Carl was late so the man was already introducing himself.

“My name is Professor Negan. Don’t call me any of that sir shit. Okay?” Negan turned see who was coming through the door. “Ah. It’s the guy who likes to run into people. You’re in my class?”

“Yes.” Carl responded quietly. Carl wasn’t talkative much anyway but something about Negan made Carl want to stop talking altogether. Negan also pissed Carl off although Carl wasn’t sure why.

“What was that? I didn’t hear you.” Maybe Carl did know why.

“I said yes I am.”

“Alright then go find a spot.” Negan gestured towards the back of the room, somewhat absentmindedly. “Hurry, Kid. I have a class to run.”  
Carl did as he was told and took a seat near the back.


	2. Coffee Shops Are A Driving Force Of Fate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been a few weeks since classes started and Carl meets Negan unexpectedly at a coffee shop. They have a kind of pleasant conversation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's cussing and some bad innuendos. You have been warned

It’s been a few weeks and Carl feels much better about his decision to go to a college so far away. His classes with professor Negan are definitely not as embarrassing or awkward now that he’s gotten over the ‘I bumped into and fell on my ass in front of this man’. Carl also feels better that he knows that if anyone is ever late Negan will put them on the spot, call them out, ask them questions, even more so than he had with Carl. Carl supposes that Negan went easy on him because when he was late it was just the first day of class.

Over the weekend Carl went to hang out with Ron, Mikey and Enid. It ended up being extremely fun, he even found out that they all have quite a few things in common. He made plans to meet up with them again the next week, and even that went really well. 

All of Carl’s other classes are going on without a hitch. He’s staying on top of things and isn’t swamped with homework yet, surprisingly enough. Carl wasn’t going to join a club his first year but seeing how things are going he thinks he might be able to.

Carl starts looking for something within a week. He wants something athletic so he can stay in shape but something laid back enough that he’s not worried if he misses one meeting. Carl finds a softball team. The team meets every saturday to practice. He doesn’t know who the coach is and he won’t find out until first practice in a week. 

The last time they met up Ron told Carl about a coffee shop just off campus that he enjoyed. 

Carl decided to go one day after his last Friday class. Carl’s class ended and he packed up his things, intentionally taking longer than everyone else so he was one of the last to walk out the door.

Carl sauntered through the door of the small shop, walked up to the counter and ordered a coffee. He sat down next to the window, waiting for his order, looking out at all the people walking about. Something Carl didn’t expect to see was Negan walking down the street towards the small coffee shop. Carl was startled seeing his teacher, sliding down farther in his seat he hoped to not be seen by his teacher as he got closer. 

Negan opened the door and walked in, heading straight to the counter. In Carl’s opinion the way Negan walks looks just as anything else Negan does. 

Just as Negan reaches the counter the barista calls out Carl’s name. Carl was going to wait to get his drink but then thinks that it’s a stupid idea, it's only his teacher, Carl shouldn’t care. With that thought in mind he walks up to take his drink. While Carl is up taking his cup and adding some creamer Negan looks over at him. It takes Negan a second to place the face but then he has it.

“Hey! It’s you! The guy who enjoys running into people.” Negan leaned on the counter so his hip was propping him up against it. Carl really couldn’t see how this man could be any less attractive than he was currently. Wow, first year away from home and he already has a crush on someone he shouldn’t. _Fuck it,_ Carl thinks, _I’m already too far gone._

“Yeah, thats me.” Carl responded somewhat slowly.

“Just getting a drink? I gotta say the lemon cake is amazing.”

“Just the drink. Need a little pick-me-up after classes all day.” A nervous laugh escapes Carl’s lips.

“Absolutely, classes are fucking exhausting.” After Negan was handed his drink he led Carl to a seat near the back of the shop, away from the windows. 

When they sat down Negan set his things down in a chair beside the table while Carl kept his bag on his shoulder. They sat opposite each other, Negan waiting a moment to start the conversation back up. 

Carl sipped his coffee slowly, staring across the table at Negan. Negan noticed that Carl is nervous so he decided to try to lighten the mood by just casually chatting.

“So your name’s Carl?” Negan asked.

“Yeah, Carl Grimes.”

“Ah, Grimes. Yeah I remember that.” Negan took a long drink from his cup. “The paper you turned in last week was fucking amazing.”

“Thank you.” Carl’s cheeks dusted with a light shade of pink in result of the praise.

“What are you going to do for the week end?”

Carl gave a chuckle and answered, “I’m probably going to work on homework and sleep.”

“Goddamn you’re boring. You’re 18 right?” Carl nodded. “Go to some club, have fun.”

“I don’t really know of any clubs that’ll let an 18 year old in. Or any clubs at all, I kind of just like to stay in.”

“Again, you’re really fucking boring.” 

“You can call me Boring Grimes now,” Carl joked. Negan laughed. Carl felt accomplished.

“Yeah, Boring Grimes. It’s better then the guy who likes to run into people. Shorter too.”

Carl looked down at the table, trying to hide his smile. Negan noticed again but didn’t say anything.

“I actually am going to be doing something potentially fun.” 

“Oh yeah? What?”

“I signed up for a softball team. It meets this weekend.” Carl saw how Negan’s face shifted. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong, it just I’m the coach.” 

“The coach? Of the team I joined?”

“Yes. The coach. Of the team you joined.” Negan's eyes crinkled along with his nose when he smirked. Carl took tally of everything, especially noting the dimples appearing on Negan's cheeks.

Carl’s eyes shifted back to the table, fighting a losing battle, trying to keep the red tint from reaching his cheeks. He was still too embarrassed to actually look Negan in the eyes but he continued the conversation anyway. 

“If I’m being completely honest, I’ve never played softball before.” Negan didn’t say anything before Carl was talking again, too occupied with his drink. “I mean I’ve played baseball but that was back when I was a lot younger. So I’ll probably suck-” Negan make an awful noise in the back of his throat.

Carl was about to ask what happened when it hits him. ‘So I’ll probably suck’ Negan was laughing at what Carl just said, which pissed Carl off.

“Shut the fuck up.” Carl had a distasteful look on his face.

Negan just laughed more. “Sorry, sorry. You just caught me off guard.” Carl made a disagreeable noise by sucking his teeth. “But really, don’t worry if you can’t play or don’t know how. We just play to have fun. But… if you do suck, I wouldn’t mind.”

Was Negan flirting? Making an innuendo? Carl couldn't tell. Honestly Negan confused the hell out of Carl, and Carl hated it.

“Yeah, okay. I gotta go.” Carl said standing fast, almost knocking his chair over getting up. “I have homework.” The last word came out as almost a squeak.

“Okay, Carl. Don’t hurt yourself getting out of here.” Negan still had the smug smirk on his face, knowing he had made Carl flustered.

“Whatever.” 

Carl was out the door and jogging down the street when he noticed that his coffee was unaccounted for. There was no way in hell that Carl was going to waste three fucking dollars on a coffee and only take a few sips of it. So, he begrudgingly stomped back toward the shop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all mistakes are mine. I just finished editing so theres bound to be some


	3. Practice Makes Perfect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carl's softball practice with coach Negan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's literally been a year since I updated here. I will finish this story if its the last thing I do, even if no one reads it. I'm also just going to act as if nothing happened to Carl.

Saturday morning Carl woke up early, showered, dressed and started his walk to the ball field. The field that Negan said to meet at was around a mile and a half from Carl’s dorm, so he would be warmed up by the time he got there.

Carl was still somewhat freaked out that Negan was the coach of the softball team but he got over it when he saw all the other players. They all looked about as ‘deer in the headlights’ as Carl felt, which gave him some confidence knowing he wasn’t the only one.

As Carl got closer to the field he could see Negan talking to one of the players about their bat and he hoped everything he had was in order. 

Carl squeezed his way into the dugout between two girls who were talking hear the entrance. “Excuse me.” He said as he passed by.

“Carl?” One of the girls asked almost surprised.

Carl looks over his shoulder and sees Enid. He waves and she does as well. 

“I didn't know you signed up for softball.” She sounded happy. “Now I have one more friend to gossip with.” She jokes. 

Carl sets his things down before turning toward her, saying in the most sarcastic tone he could muster, “Totally.”

Enid laughs, so does the other girl, who Enid later introduces as Beca. Enid then throws her arm around carl, pulling him in for a hug.

Carl is smiling, Enid's arm still around his shoulders as he looks around the field, catching Negan’s eye. 

Negan is no longer talking with the player, having handed them a bat, most likely his, as a substitute. They hold each other's gaze for some time, Carl feeling his cheeks tinting pink. After a few minutes Negan finally breaks it looking down at his watch.

Negan whistles sharply catching the attention a of everyone else in the vicinity, getting them to move out onto the field. 

“Alright everyone,” Negan says after everyone has gathered. “How many of you have played at all or at least in the past three years?” 

Only five people raise their hands out of the thirteen people there. 

Negan sighs before continuing. “So, I'll start the practice off with some of the basics.”

***

After the practice Negan talks over what happened and how the team did. After the recap he dismisses everyone calling out the time of their next practice as everyone shuffles away. 

Carl is walking away with Enid and Beca, talking with them, when negan stops him with a hand on his shoulder. 

“Can I talk with you?” Negan asks and Carl just nods his head mutely. 

Enid says something about waiting for Carl as he and Negan walk back out toward the field.

He produces an award winning smile before speaking, “So, Boring Grimes, how was practice with scary profesor negan?” 

Carl hadn’t been nervous since practice started but now the butterflies were back with a vengeance. Carl knew it was Negan making him anxious. “It was fine.”

Negan chuckles as Carl's short reply. “What’s wrong? I’m not going to bite.” He gestures toward Enid and Beca. “I see you made some friends.”

“Yeah, kinda.” Carl was going to stop there but before Negan could continue Carl kept going. He tried to sound more confident or something this time. “I knew Enid before but I just met Beca. She seems cool though.”

“Ah. Good to see you making friends. Now, your glove. Can I see it?” 

Carl nods, handing it to him.

Negan looks it over and hands it back to him.

“You should get some oil or conditioner to work in that glove. It’s a little stiff. I’ll lend you a ball and you can look up how it do it.”

“Okay,” Carl says. “Thanks.” He adds almost as an afterthought. 

They walk back to the dugout, Carl gathering his things while continuing his conversation with Enid and Beca. 

Negan grabs a ball from one of his buckets. “Here.” He hands the ball to Carl.

“Thanks.” Carl says again putting the ball in his bag picking it up walking away with Enid and Beca.

After they get far enough away Beca says, “Coach is pretty hot.”

Carl was taken aback by her bold statement. Of course he had noticed how good Negan looked but he had never outright thought he was anything. But, now that he was thinking about it Negan did have the sexiest dimples he had ever seen. 

The more and more he thought about it he came to realize that his teacher was really attractive. 

“I don’t know, not my type I guess.” Enid comments off hand. “Carl?” She adds, asking his two cents.

“I hadn't noticed.” Carl said awkwardly. 

Truthfully, he hadn't. Emphasys on past tense.


	4. My Body Is NOT Ready

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carl and Negan share some time alone. Carl is sick and Negan just wants to help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: I'm thinking of renaming this. Thoughts? Suggestions?
> 
> Also, because of this story I visited WebMD for the first time. I can never get that time back.

Carl’s first practice with Professor Negan was a month ago. There have been five practices since then and Carl has been having a blast. The only downside, however, is since his relizastion he has to actually put forth effort to focus on the game. He’s even had a close call involving a ball and his face because he had been staring at Negan.

After practice one day, Enid and Beca invited Carl to get ice cream. Carl had a good time and so did the girls. So much so that they invited him out again. He has almost begun to feel like one of their girlfriends and he isn’t quite sure whether that’s a good or bad thing. 

Ron and Mikey managed to pull Carl out to a party with them. Carl hated it but apparently hid it well enough because they asked if he wanted to go to another one. He said yes. The party was as terrible as the first but he continued to feign enjoyment.

The week of the party Carl noticed less people started showing up for classes. He was confused as to what was happening, but thought nothing of it. If there was something happening he would have known about it.

The party seemed to be as packed as one would expect, but Carl did notice that there were a few key people of the party scene missing. Eventually the school issued a formal notice/warning to all students living in the dorms. 

The flu was going around campus. None of the teachers were aloud to assign or go over anything important in class, due to the amount of students catching the virus. Some of the teachers even canceled their classes. 

The classes that weren't cancelled acted as glorified study groups.

Carl walked into his English class finding that he was one of only four to show up. One guy, who was seated the far corner of the room, was wearing a baseball cap and curling into himself. Carl thought he might be sick but dedicated. 

He stayed as far from that guy as possible. 

Negan appeared to be in perfect health, chatting with everyone -that showed up- before class started, like he normally would. 

The class started with Negan going over what was talked about last class. Carl did notice that he didn’t walk around the room as much as he would usually. Still, that might just be because there were only four participants, mostly grouped together.

At the halfway point of class Negan announced that if anyone had questions they could come up, but, if they were clear on what was being gone over then they were excused. Two students left and Carl and the guy in the hat were the only ones left. ‘Hat guy’ went to Negan first, only asking a few questions before he was done and left as well.

Carl was next to get help from Negan but he seemed to be cursed with as much understanding of literature as a walnut does.

***

“That was meant to be funny? I need cliff notes.” Carl said in mock desperation.

“I don’t see why you don’t.” Negan chuckled at Carl’s performance. 

“The library was out.” Carl sighed. 

Carl went to lean on the table with his elbow but he misjudged where it ended and barely hit the edge of it. He didn’t realize that his elbow hadn’t found purchase before to was too late and wound up hitting his chin and shoulder on the table, _hard_.

Carl let out a string of profanities as Negan asked if he was okay, barely holding back his laughter long enough to finish his question.

“Dam kid you almost swear like I do.” Negan chuckled as his laughing fit calmed.

“You don’t swear.” Carl said absentmindedly as he rubbed his chin. 

Negan took Carl’s face in his hands and tilted it upward. Carl’s cheeks were set ablaze; he was thankful his head was up and Negan might not be able to see it. Negan shifted Carl’s head from side to side, capturing the impact point at all angles the horrific lighting of the lecture hall could provide. 

“What? You don’t remember our coffee date?” Negan jokes. “This is going to bruise. How hard were you trying to hit the table?”

Carl huffs, taking Negan’s hands off his face. “I think I’m gonna to go.”

“But you were just starting to understand the plot and the foreshadowing!” Negan mock-calls at Carl’s back, as Carl packed his things

“Yeah. I’m not really in the mood for school now.” ‘Because I completely embarrassed myself in front of you’, Carl wanted to say but held his tongue, because that would be even more embarrassing.

“Don’t worry about it.” Negan says, thinking. “Y’know, I’m headed to the coffee shop down the way after class if you want to join.”

Carl flushes, stuffing the library book in his bag before answering. 

Going could turn out to be a good or bad thing depending on what happens. He could get to know Negan better and see if this crush thing is even worth it. Or he could make an even bigger fool of himself in front of Negan. 

Choices.

He takes too long to make up his mind and Negan takes it as a silent rejection.

“It’s okay if you don't want to go. You don’t have to spend unnecessary time with an old teacher.” Negan says brushing it off.

Carl almost makes an apology and accepts the invitation but opts for Negan to chose for him. 

He stands from his chair. “You’re not that old.” He says goodbye to Negan then leaves. 

***

The next week Carl doesn’t attend Classes. He has some friends of his take notes for him, and spends his time in the small coffee shop that was way too expensive -in Carl’s opinion. He’s brooding. His immune system managed to hold out until the tail end of the sickness, which left him unable to attend classes that he actually needed.

He sits wrapped in a large hoodie at one of the tables in the front of the store, next to the window, warming himself the best he could with the sun. He has a small coffee in front of him next to a plain bagel that has barely been nibbled on.

Negan walks by the shop, not planning on going in but sees Carl. He looks absolutely miserable, red dusting his cheeks, bags under his eyes, and looking absolutely exhausted. Negan can tell he has succumb to the illness that had been going around. 

Negan hadn’t gotten any inkling of sickness and he hadn’t been avoiding it so he assumed, since the worst had passed, he was in the clear. So, he decides to go into the shop to visit Carl.

He enters the shop and walks to the counter, ordering his regular and grabs a bottle of water. He stays by the counter, waiting for his order, as he watches Carl. He doesn't seem to have noticed Negan enter. Still leaning up against the window, his eyes closed, Negan began to think Carl might be asleep.

After Negan’s order is up, he strides confidently over to Carl’s table, letting his boots fall on the floor heavily, hoping to not scare Carl. Carl hears Negan approaching and glances over. Negan doesn't ask before sitting across from him, setting the water down in front of Carl.

“Coffee’s no good when you’re sick, kid.” Negan moves Carl’s cup away from him. Carl doesn’t protest.

“I’ve never had to take care of myself alone before.” Carl whines. Negan is taken aback by this. Carl seems so vulnerable, and a slight hint of annoying. 

“You don’t have friends or common sense?” Negan asks, jokingly. 

“No.” Carl cracks a smile.

“But seriously, a bagel and coffee? Do you even know the basics? Get you some crackers and gatorade. Stay hydrated.” Negan nudges the water bottle closer to Carl.

Carl is back to whining. “I barely had enough energy to get here! How am I supposed to go to the store? And all my damn friends are either still getting over being sick or don’t know how to use a fucking bus.” Fuck you, Beca.

In a fit of exasperation, and a burst of energy, he snatches his bagel off the tabe. He then sets it back down, looking exhausted and defeated, again, picking small parts off and putting them in his mouth.

Negan sat, watching the show of emotions silently. When Carl started looking defeated Negan thought it was one of the most distressing things he had ever seen. 

Negan shoves a napkin over to Carl as he reaches into his bag. “I need your number.” Negan states.

To, somewhat, hide his embarrassment Carl jokingly states, “Well aren’t you forward.” Laughing his embarrassment off after. 

Carl refuses to give himself time to think about what could happen, or the likelihood of Negan being a serial killer, so he stuffs the bagel in his mouth. He barely gives himself enough time to swallow before he chugs the water Negan brought for him.

Negan sits up straight and presents a blue ballpoint pen to Carl. He takes it tentatively and writes his number down quickly. He slides the napkin back to Negan when he’s done.

“Thanks." He shoves the napkin into his bag. “I swear I won't call you incessantly or anything.” Negan laughs.

That did nothing to console Carl. If anything his fears were more probable, in his mind at least.

“Haha.” Carl was definitely regretting it now. Good thing he hadn’t let himself think. Or maybe it wasn’t a good thing, he didn’t know yet.

After a few more minutes together Negan has to leave. Negan stands from his chair, picking up his and Carl’s drink. He puts Carl’s coffee in the trash. Three fucking dollars wasted, Carl thinks. 

He waves as Nagan walks out the door, heading toward wherever he was going beforehand. Carl was sad to see him go. He was having a good time just sitting and talking with him. It distracted Carl from how shitty he was feeling. 

The only downside to the little conversation was that Carl’s crush grew twelve times. He laughed at himself because he knew nothing would come of it. But he just kept lying to himself.


	5. The Stranger And The Hot Mess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan comes over and Carl is more silent in his objections.

Carl woke from a power-nap (that didn’t work) the next day to an unknown number calling. It took until the second call before he remembered that he had given his number out to Negan. He answered quickly because the phone had already rung four times. 

“Hello?”

A calm, strong voice answers. “It’s Negan. Hope I didn’t disturb you.”

Despite his general aching he was still happy to hear Negan’s voice. “Haha, never.”

“I was wanting to meet up. So, if you feel up for it we can meet at the coffee place.” 

Carl looks down at his sweat pants and lack of a clean shirt. “Um…”

After a long pause Negan speaks again. “Or… I could come to your house?” Negan says, inquisitive.

“Yeah.” Carl says, drawing out the word hesitantly. He wants to slap himself for literally inviting a stranger to his home.

“Okay. I’m gonna need your address.”

“I live in the dorm on campus. So, I guess I’ll meet you outside.” 

***

Carl is seated in the ‘lobby’ part of the boys dorm with his phone out playing games, looking out the window periodically while he waits for Negan. He’s pulled his hair back into a bun at the back of his head and he put on a hoodie that he had been living in for the past five days. 

Negan is walking down the sidewalk toward the building when Carl spots him. He is wearing dark-washed jeans with a white shirt and a leather jacket. He is holding plastic grocery bags in his hands, looking exceedingly more casual then what Carl is accustomed to. Carl looks at himself and thinks he looks like a mess.

Carl stands from his seat and goes to the door, checking his pocket for the key before stepping out to meet Negan.

“Hey.” Negan greets.

“Hi.” Carl chuckles nervously. “How much stuff did you bring?”

Negan looks down at his bags, chuckling before continuing. “I didn’t know how much longer you’d be out so I thought I’d be prepared.” Negan starts walking to the door.

“I can just take them.” Carl says holding his hand out to Negan.

“It’s fine. I want to explain some of it to you anyway.”

“Alright.” Carl agrees, not wanting to pass up an opportunity to not exert himself.  
However, he is cautious. Carl unlocks and holds the door open for Negan.

“How chivalrous of you.” 

They walk up the stairs to Carl’s dorm. When they get to the room Carl holds that door open for Negan as well. They make their way into the room and Carl directs Negan to set the bags on one of the beds. 

Negan gestures to the empty bed, “What, no roommate?”

“I wish. No, he just moved out because of the sickness. He still attends classes but since I’m sick he hasn’t moved back in yet.”

“Not quite that lucky, huh?” Carl shrugs as Negan continues to look around the room, at Carl's things. 

“Well,” Negan plunks himself down on the bed. “I brought a ton of shit.” He says as he starts through the bags.

“I’ve got gatorade,” He sets a red, an orange, and a blue bottle on the bed. “Didn’t know what kind you liked so I got the main three.” By the size of the bottles Carl guessed they were the largest ones Negan could find. 

“I also brought saltenes.” He pulls out two boxes of store brand crackers. “And a banana and applesauce. ‘Cause I hear that’s good too.” He sets one banana and a box of applesauce on the bed. 

He reaches back into his bag. “And then I got you a water bottle. Because apparently you don’t know what you’re doing.” It was a fancy one with a filter in the middle, filled with water. 

Carl had stood in silence, watching, as Negan pulled thing after thing out of the bags and now that Negan was done Carl could freak out properly. Negan had to have spent so much money on him! He couldn’t accept it!

“You got me so much. You didn’t have to do that.” Carl stumbled over his words, his cheeks already warm. “You spent a lot of money on this-” 

“My choice. Please don’t try to shove money on me. I’m no stripper.” He laughs at his own joke, Carl does not.

“I don’t think I can thank you enough.”

“Don’t worry about it. Again, my choice. You didn’t ask me to do this.” Negan stands up from the bed. “Well, I guess I’m off.” He picks up the plastic bags from the bed balling them up and stuffing them in his pockets

When they are in the ‘lobby’ again Negan stops before going to the door. He puts his hand on Carl’s shoulder. 

“Feel better, kid.” Then he walks out the door, back down the sidewalk and out of Carl’s sight.

Carl slowly walks back to his room, almost in a haze. Looking over his bed, he laughs at himself for the butterflies forming in his stomach. He sits down in the same spot Negan had, just taking it all in.

Carl decided he would have to make something to give to Negan; Lord knows he doesn’t have enough money to actually pay him back. Maybe cookies in the communal kitchen downstairs? He wasn’t sure yet. 

He opened a pot of applesauce and started eating it, feeling giddy. His crush wasn’t going to go away if Negan kept doing things like this for him. Or if Negan gives him any sort of attention at all. He is helplessly in love with a man that he doesn’t even know outside of school.

Carl flips through his phone saving Negan’s number, putting three blue hearts next to his name.


End file.
